Elon Musk Set to Show Twitter Employees the Door

News on the wire says Elon Musk is readying a virtual firing squad for 75% of Twitter employees once he finalizes a deal with the social media platform. And that has 5,500 minions debating who gets the axe, the nearest safe space location, or why Tiffany in accounting is escaping the purge. As conspiracy theories go, the business deals of this billionaire have the air ripe with rumor, innuendo, and a whiff of fear. But, massive amounts of pink slips aside, the Tesla man is shivering the timbers of Democrats and progressives by hinting at reinstating former President Donald Trump’s personal account. And then the world would, no doubt, be over.

Musk pulled out of buying Twitter for $44 billion once before, landing him and the whole mess tied up in the courts. But it appears, and according to “those familiar with the matter,” the deal is darn near done.

Is Elon Musk a National Security Risk?

It didn’t take long for all sorts of insinuations and attempts at fearmongering to launch in Musk’s direction. The promise of reinstating closed Twitter accounts of conservative pundits who may say something mean is not what the current administration will allow. The Biden bunch is now scrutinizing  Musk’s personal involvement with internet satellite company Starlink and Twitter. Apparently, the billionaire is very friendly with other billionaires, world leaders, and the like, and the administration is floating the idea wealthy bromances are a risk to national security.

Prince Alwaleed bin Talal of Saudi Arabia and Qatar’s Sovereign Wealth Fund are investors in the Twitter deal. And the White House is worried about the company’s proprietary information, or personal data, on Americans. The irony is slightly delicious if it weren’t so disturbing, considering the wiretaps on citizens and government agencies already gathering that American intel under Mr. Biden’s purview. But, add in a pot chockful of Chinese spies having been found on the government payroll; that fear is either laughable or a deliberate distraction.

No Risk: Big Meany

Twitter will transfer leadership by October 28 as directed by the courts, and the winds of change will sting the faces of the faithful determined not to allow for a mean tweet. Musk coopted tech investor Jason Calacanis to act as advisor and wingman to affect a plan of action. The goal is to double the revenues of the platform within one year. And that would help the struggling billionaire after $140 billion stock loss with Tesla. But what is the plan?

(Photo illustration by Chesnot/Getty Images)

That’s where assembling the firing squad comes into play. Reduce a bloated staff, expand the number of verified users, provide better perks for paying users, and develop a “Creator Team” to release content to Twitter before anyone else gets ahold of it. Calacanis also noted that if a policy were put into place requiring employees to be in the office two days a week, a few thousand would just quit outright because that could be a hostile work environment or whatever excuse is trending.

There is a loyal following of Musk from other insanely wealthy folks who like the idea of America First and freedom of speech. Due to the court reviewing the Twittergate case, texts between Elon Musk and other billionaires, like Oracle founder Larry Ellison, who was interested in investing in the media platform, were eye-opening.

This is how billionaires do business by text:

Elon Musk: “EU passed a law banning Russia Today and several other Russian news sources. We have been told to block their IP address. Actually, I find their news quite entertaining.”

Antonio Gracias, Director of Tesla (2007-2021): “This is BLEEPING nuts…you are totally right. 100% agree with you. We should allow it precisely because we hate it…that is the ping of the American constitution.”

Musk: “Free speech matters most when it’s someone you hate spouting what you think is bull—-.”

Antonio Gracias: “I am 100% with you Elon. To the BLEEPING mattresses no matter what….this is a principle we need to BLEEPING defend with our lives or we are lost to the darkness. Sorry for the swearing. I am getting excited.”

So hard to argue with anyone demanding this country live up to Its founding principles.

This is It

If all goes according to the court timeline, Musk will commandeer Twitter and send 75% of employees to the unemployment line. Just in time to open the platform a few days before midterm elections, letting the free people of America and around the globe have at it. It would behoove Mr. Billionaire to throw a filter in now and again to block users who blatantly call for violence, schedule riots and smash and grabs, and allows for people not versed in human biology to spread rumors of men having babies. No one would have to look out for such things in a perfect world. But here we are. And Musk is in the captain’s chair, either steering toward the end as we know it or, fingers crossed, a small slice of America as she was meant to be.